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How To Help A Loved One Who Is Resistant To Care
It’s difficult for anyone to be a caregiver, and this is especially true if your loved one doesn’t want help. Understanding what resistance they’re experiencing can make it easier to care for them — in the end, you’ll both feel better!
Understanding why an elderly person may resist being cared for helps you know how best to approach that situation with empathy rather than frustration.
What Causes Resistance To Care?
If your loved one is in need of care, he or she may be feeling a sense of loss: physical losses like the inability to walk without assistance; mental losses such as memory and cognition abilities that diminish over time. Your loved one might also feel lost due to other life changes like the death of their spouse or living alone for so long they have no support system at home. Accepting help could mean relinquishing privacy and adjusting routines — which can result in feelings ranging from fearfulness to vulnerability about being dependent on others. There are some who refuse all forms of aid because it means losing independence, becoming a burden on family members, embarrassing themselves with immobility issues (in front of those weaker than them), experiencing new sources of anger when there’s nothing they can do about their own situation.
How To Approach A Loved One About Their Need For Care?
A discussion about the person’s care needs can be an emotionally challenging conversation. One way to help this go smoothly is by being sensitive to your loved one and their situation, starting a chat with them before you bring up any concerns or questions, practicing open-ended communication skills such as listening well and avoiding leading statements that imply criticism of current life choices (ex: “you should quit smoking”), following up if they seem unsure about what steps would best suit their individual circumstances (“can I ask why?”), looking for nonverbal cues like eye contact when making suggestions on how they might do things differently in order to have more control over activities of daily living.
A doctor may start discussing the patient’s need for healthcare services at some point during a visit. The following are a couple of tips you will want to keep in mind while discussing care.
• Evaluate your loved one’s needs and find the services that will work best for them. Determine what kind of help is needed, whether it be physical or emotional support from friends and family members because this could make a huge difference to their quality of life moving forward in sobriety.
• It’s important to make a point of spending time with your loved one when you’re both not stressed out. This will help open up communication and allow for an honest conversation without things getting too heated.
• When you’re looking into care for your loved one, it’s important to take their wishes and preferences into consideration. Some of the things they might want include who provides the service or type of funeral that will be held after death. In considering what services are best suited for a family member in need, sometimes people make assumptions about matters like which relatives should provide support rather than asking them directly; while these decisions may not always come up during conversations with someone else over coffee, there is nothing wrong with taking time out to talk more deeply about such topics as part of an overall conversation so long as this person wants that level of detail from you at all times.
• Offer to help your loved one take a break from their responsibilities for the day. It might be just what they need to get back on track, and it allows you time together without stress or worry of picking up where they left off when things become hectic again later that day.
• Don’t give up. It may seem like your loved one isn’t interested, but you never know what they’re thinking or feeling and it’s worth a try to find out more if only for peace of mind.
Effective Strategies For Dealing With Resistance To Care
Encourage collaboration for the greater good of everyone by showing them how their contributions will benefit others.
• Most of the time, when a loved one is making decisions about their care options it can be an emotionally charged process. It’s important to take steps in advance that will make this transition as smooth and stress-free for them as possible by suggesting trial runs with different providers or communities before they are faced with any final decision.
• Everyone needs a break from time to time, and your loved one is no different. Respite care can be an excellent opportunity for them to take some much-needed “me” time during the day or evening so they’re not exhausted by their responsibilities when it’s finally bedtime again.
• A lot of people struggle to maintain a healthy relationship with their loved ones because they are afraid that they will need more care and become dependent. This is not always the case, however. You can get your needs met by asking for help from time to time so you don’t have to be as stressed about it later on or even less enjoy life now due to financial concerns.
• Your loved one might have a hard time accepting the care they need – but don’t let that make you give up on them. It’s important to explore their concerns and address any worries about cost or your ability to afford it so everyone can be at peace with what needs to happen next.
• Pick your battles wisely. It is highly unlikely that you can change someone’s mind, so it’ll be better to focus on the big picture than stressing out over something small.
Please email us or give us a call at (+1) 714-528-4990 to get more information.
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